“Stop being such a man.
You’re not allowed to be a man to the very core of your being. Don’t you know that? Just stop it. I mean, it’s fine to be a man, but please don’t be a MAN.”
This message is coming at our husbands and sons with gale force these days.
I know this problem is nothing new on the scene today. This is one of the many sad results of the out-of-control feminism of the past several decades. Men are stripped of their manhood in every arena of society. The consequences of this de-masculization are probably more far-reaching than any of us realize.
Here is how I have seen it playing out lately–
It’s fine for a man to be accused without evidence, to have his character destroyed on the basis of one woman’s uncorroborated sob story. Perfectly fine. It’s not fine for that man to rise up in self-defense, anger, and indignation over the unfounded accusations. He’s unfit for leadership at that point. Such a bad boy.
It’s fine for a woman to dress/undress and display her body in any manner she pleases. She’s beautiful, she’s confident, and she’s not inhibited by anyone’s opinion. Perfectly fine. It’s not fine for a man to respond to the advertisement of her body and everything she’s got by being stimulated in a sexual manner. He’s an animal at that point. Such a bad boy.
{I am not endorsing or excusing out-of-control anger or out-of-control sexual desire in any way. Those things are of course very real and they are wrong. I’m not talking about men who will use their prowess to harm a weaker individual or to take advantage of innocent people. I’m talking about good men who desire to do the right things, who display love and honor for their wives and children.}
It’s fine for a wife to make her own plans and decisions, live her own life, and determine the direction of the family. She’s capable and she’s got it all together. Perfectly fine. It’s not fine for a husband to express his wishes (kindly), to make suggestions, and to want to know his wife’s plans. Let alone desire to lead the family or to think his wife should consider his advice. He’s a dumb, egotistical, selfish pig at that point. Such a bad boy.
Our society seems to be completely unaware that 1- there is such a thing as a good boy and 2- there is such a thing as a bad girl.
Ladies, we must let our men be men. We must affirm to our husbands, sons, and society that real men are needed and they are valued. We must respect and honor them in their manhood, manhood that runs deep and strong. We must stop treating our good, honorable men like bad boys. As women, we desire to be respected and affirmed. Our society has no trouble understanding that point. Our men are deserving of absolutely no less. ♥ 
Treasuring Home 
Excellent article Jennifer. We all need to stop pandering to the feminist agenda and speak out; that we as women love, support and appreciate good men! Thankfully there are many more good men than bad men, and we are so grateful to them for their sacrifice, their hard work and their love!
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So you the feminist agenda is a woman speaking out against her sexual assault? That has absolutely nothing to do with the masculinity of my son and husband. Odd that you would conflate the two.
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Hi Kate, I am not at all conflating the two. I am contrasting the reaction of the news media (driven by the feminist agenda) to these two things- 1.) her choice to speak out about alleged sexual assault, and 2.) his choice to speak out and defend his good name and his claim to innocence. Her choice was portrayed as good and his choice was portrayed as bad. {I am certainly an advocate of women speaking out against sexual assault or any abuse.}
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I guess I don’t see the same messages that you see coming at my husband and son with gale force.
My teenage son is getting messages from our President that sexual assault really doesn’t matter. One can disagree with the allegations of Dr. Ford without needing to be disrespectful. Just in these last few weeks we have turned back the clock in how comfortable women will be in reporting their sexual assault. I have a 20 year old daughter that is hearing these messages.
My son plays football and lifts weights. These aren’t activities that I went out of my way to encourage. Football games are attended by more people than any other high school event. That sends quite a message to both the spectators and the players. This is probably true in many places. He is happy and does well in school. Not sure I see any gale force messages there.
I am aware that men have their own unique struggles, and also that women can be “bad”. My sister has had many many struggles in her life.
But I’m not sure I see that men are being stripped of their manhood in every arena of society.
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Thanks for sharing your thoughts Kate! Our family has come to really enjoy football the past several years. I agree that football is a great asset to society in the sense that it encourages manhood and masculine behavior. From what I understand, it seems the feminist agenda would either have women playing on the field with the men or do away with the NFL altogether. As for the Kavanaugh situation, I hope it will discourage anyone from making accusations if they don’t have evidence to back up their claim. I hope it will also encourage men not to cave, to stand their ground and stand for their integrity. They are not automatically guilty if accused. I understand your concern that your daughter feels she can come forward if she is ever victimized. (Ford was overwhelmingly applauded for doing so.) But do you also have a concern that your husband or son could one day be accused? And in the case that your husband or son were innocent, would you be glad that Kavanaugh stood his ground and (narrowly) succeeded?
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